


For The Love of The Industry

by RChaha



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: AD!Liam, Actor!Niall, Agent!Zayn, Cool movie in the middle, Director!Harry, Eating Disorders, I dare you to read it, M/M, makeupartist!louis, triggers I guess?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-19
Updated: 2014-07-12
Packaged: 2018-01-19 22:38:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1486687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RChaha/pseuds/RChaha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rolling his eyes, Niall sunk to the floor and tried not to get angry. Honestly, he didn’t know why he had to change his image. People were calling him the next “Tom Cruise” after all. Action movies were great. He could pretend to be James Bond and he could pretend that he could control his demons with bad guys and unbelievable charm. But what happens when the demons are inside of you?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is a dual operation here. I couldn't have done it without my partner in crime and best bud, D. She doesn't have an account here, but we have a joint account named ArtsyNarry on Wattpad. You can find her there.  
> This is my first time writing Narry. It's D's OTP, so I thought I'd give it a shot.  
> Kudos and Comments make our day.

 

             With a worried eye, Niall picked up his shirt slowly and looked towards the horrible, truth-telling monster.

The mirror showed him what he dreaded to see, the fat still covering his stomach, his waist, his everything. Nothing was working. Nothing was ever working.

With a sigh, Niall peeled down his shirt as his phone started to ring.

The annoying sound of Miley Cyrus singing about…about God knows what, filled his ears. That meant Zayn, his agent, was calling. Zayn liked to change his ringtone on Niall’s phone just for kicks. He would always put his latest obsession on. This month it was Miley Cyrus’ new album, “Bangerz.” Next month, who knows what it would be.

            “This is Niall.” That’s how Niall always answered his calls. It was one of those weird, actory professional things.

             “Tell me you love me.” Zayn’s melodic yet rough tone sprang into Niall’s ears. He sighed before thinking, “It’s going to be one of those days.” (One of those days where Zayn will force him into being an actual human being when all Niall wants to do is curl up in a ball and cry about how horrible he is.)

             “Come on, mate. Ya know I love ya. What’s this about/”

He could hear Zayn’s excitement bleeding through the phone.

           “I have something for you, something different than the movies that you’ve done previously.”

Rolling his eyes, Niall sunk to the floor and tried not to get angry. Honestly, he didn’t know why he had to change his image. People were calling him the next “Tom Cruise” after all. Action movies were great. He could pretend to be James Bond and he could pretend that he could control his demons with bad guys and unbelievable charm. But what happens when the demons are inside of you?

         “Hello, Niall. Aye, mate, you there?”

         “Yeah, yeah,” He needed to stop zoning out like that in front of Zayn. He’d start to get suspicious. “So, who’s the director, Christopher Nolan… no, Michael bay!” Directors were always the best or worst part of being in the “industry.” They could either make the experience great or unforgettable even, or they could make it hell.

          “Actually, the director and writer is the same person. You’ve probably heard of him, an up-and-coming guy, Harry Styles.”

Niall vaguely knew of the lad. He’d been in the news a bit, new, cute popular director, out with boys and girls or whatever. Niall didn’t really pay attention to the news, not since his own face had started popping up in it.

         “Yeah, Harry Styles. People are saying he’s a cross between Wes Anderson and Tim Burton.  Have you seen last film? It’s fucking genius. Anyway, I’ve looked at his latest script and this part, James, it’s made for you.”

He doubted that, but he owed it to Zayn to at least do something, put forth some effort.”

         “Alright, Zaynie. Send me over that script and I’ll say if I can really put my “acting abilities-“ Zaynie scoffed, “in this script, if it really is so good.”

        “I’m telling you, Niall. It’s great. Oh, and I forgot to mention, Harry Styles… he’s, well, different.”

Doing another movie meant getting back into shape, eating less and less and less. He had already been cutting it to about 1,000 calories a day. But it’d have to be less. It always had to be less.

 

        It was his third time reading the script, and the more he read, the more he realized how much of a genius Harry Styles actually is. It was fantastic. It was this gay romance, but that was the least unique thing about the script.

       It was about two kids. One (James) is a teenager who is a musician, trying to struggle through high school and the loss of his parents. He’s…angry and misguided and alone. But, he’s strangely beautiful. Niall is barely familiar with the script and he’s already fallen in love with James. And then his counterpart, William, is the quarterback of the football team, star of the high school.. He’s innocent and sweet and kind. But James kind of hates him. James hates him because Will is everything he isn’t. He’s innocent and sweet and kind. James kind of hates him. James hates him because Will is everything he isn’t.

      It’s beautiful. It’s quirky and weird and it’s… Niall has to be in it. He has to.

 

                “I could kiss you.” Niall declares, still going through the script.

                “Tell me you want it.” He could hear the laugh in Zayn’s voice, the pompous dick. Excitement was already flourishing inside of Niall, making him almost giddy.

This is what he loved about being an actor. He wanted to become James. Well, he wanted to become anyone but himself, but he really wanted to become James. His journey is exciting, more exciting than any type of James Bond that Niall had read for.

 

                The casting part went by fairly smoothly. It turns out that they had already casted William, the quarterback with Dylan O’Brien. Niall has to look him up. He then proceeded to watch his interviews for the next two hours. He was a nice lad, tall, smart, and kind. Niall was already imagining what it’d be like to work next to him, to have to fall in love with him. Niall didn’t think he’d mind. It was all fine, really. The story being a gay romance didn’t affect him at all. It just was. Niall…Niall just liked to go with the flow. That’s what he always did.

                 Niall read with Dylan. He was reading with e very possible candidate for James. But Niall was the last one of the day. He knew he was perfect. He knew that he could master that soft, subtlety of hurt that James has, but still put on the hard exterior of his character. Because he was the last of the day, Dylan walked out with him.

               “Can I tell you something?” Dylan asked as they both walked to their cars.

                “Yeah, of course.” Niall was still slightly obsessing over his audition. Did they like him? Was he too soft? Was he too rough? Did they think he wanted the part?

               “Well first of all-“ he started, “Dude, I fucking loved you in _Slight Perspective_. I think I dreamed of being you once.”

That brought a laugh to Niall. He had enjoyed the movie. It was fun.

                “Secondly,” Dylan walked close to the blonde headed, Irishmen before whispering, “I’m rooting for you.”

 

                It was a week later before he got the call. The only thing left to do was meet with the director. Harry Styles’ assistant, Lane or Lion or something like that, called him and set up a dinner at a small Thai restaurant in downtown LA.

Zayn was ecstatic,

                Niall checked himself in the mirror one last time. He decided to go with a mainly casual outfit with black skinny jeans, a gray shirt, and a purple scarf. He looked well, okay, as good as he’d get given that it was…him.

              The restaurant was small, smaller than anything he’d gone to with a director before. It seemed quirky, something Niall was beginning to expect. With a shudder of excitement, Niall opened the doors to the quaint restaurant. There, in his direct eye line, was Harry Styles.

He was looking down at his script, going through the pages and making small notes. He was smiling to himself, seemingly pleased.

Zayn’s words were ringing in Niall’s ears. _He’s different._

         Niall had a feeling that “different” might have been an understatement.


	2. Chapter 2 (because I'm too fucking lazy to name them)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dinner between Niall and Harry leads Niall to surprising revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I'm shit at writing chapter summaries. The chapter is good. Hopefully.  
> Please comment and let me know what's going on. Do you like it? Do you hate it?   
> and I ain't stopping you from kudoing it either. Just sayin.  
> Or you don't have to. Free will and all.

 

               Niall slowly walks towards the table, towards the famous, Harry Styles. When he’s about halfway there, Harry looks up and sees him. With a beaming smile, he stands up and says, “You’re Niall Horan.”

“Indeed,” the bottle-blonde replies before putting his hand out to shake and saying, “Harry Styles, right?”

                He’s beautiful. Despite the fact that Niall had never been in a real relationship before, he knows what beautiful is when he sees it.

While they’re shaking hands, he’s caught by the bright green in the director’s eyes. Again, the only word he can think of is _beautiful._

The director has a smug grin on his face, his signature style, Niall guesses, when he catches the shorter fellow non-creepily (who is he kidding he’s a total fucking creep) staring.

                “Shall we?” Harry says, gesturing towards the other chair by the table. Fumbling, Niall nods shallowly and rushes to the other seat.

“So, let’s get to it.” Harry begins. This is the part that Niall was most nervous about. He needs Harry to know how important this project is to him, how much it has already affected him.

               “Mr. Styles-“Niall starts.

               “C’mon, call me, Harry. You’re like my age. Don’t make me feel old, man.” Harry laughs back.

               “Harry,” Niall corrects himself, “When I read your screenplay for the first time, well, I was just in awe. The characters are so rich. I don’t mean to sound too crazy about this, I just want you to know how much I loved it. It was an honor to just be able to read it.”

              During his little speech, Niall couldn’t quite look up to meet Harry’s gaze. The thing was that Niall didn’t want a lot of things. In fact, when he wanted something, he was always left feeling unworthy. Happiness had never come into play before. Wanting something was always irrelevant. But this, this spark of life written by this intriguing man that held the souls of his characters in his eyes, well, this he wanted.

A waiter came to introduce himself and ask what they’d like, interrupting the silence that had unfolded. Happily, Harry chatted with the waiter.

             “Hi! I’ll take that Thai iced tea and this gentleman will be having…” With raised eyebrows, Harry looked at him with a questioning glance.

             “Just water, thanks.”

The waiter left in a hurry, letting the silence sit between the two men once again. It got so awkward that Niall felt he had no choice but to meet Harry’s gaze.

The thing about the gaze of a man is that if it’s just strong enough, held long enough, someone can feel it in their bones. And Niall, Niall could feel it.

             “Niall… You there?”

Fuck. He needed to stop doing that. He gave a small smile in Harry’s direction to let the man know that yes, yes he’s here, or trying to be at least.

“I saw your audition tapes with Dylan.” He paused and tried to get the attention of a waiter before continuing, “You’re good.”

The spark of approval had Niall almost giddy, inexplicably.

This was happening. He was going to become James.

The waiter’s bland question of whether or not they were ready to order grabbed Niall out of his hazy moment of happiness.

Harry, expectantly, looked at Niall. For the first time since he came to the restaurant, he actually looked down at the menu.

           “Uhm.. uh.. fuck.” He shot Harry a pathetic look that said, _I don’t know these words please help me order. Also, please hire me for your movie._

Amazingly, Harry could read him like a book. His piercing stare raked over Niall’s confused and dazzled look before turning to the waiter and saying, “I think we’ll both get the vegetable pad Thai, please.” Wearing an almost contemplative expression, he turns his head so that he can whisper to Niall, “I hope that’s okay.”

Harry could have ordered him goose eggs as far as he cared, as long as he let Niall be in his movie. Besides, it wasn’t like he was actually going to eat most of whatever was on his plate. How could he? He didn’t know the calorie intake or what it’d do to his body. But it was nice that Harry was trying to be so helpful.

           “What drew you to the story, then?”

This Niall could answer.

          “Actually,” He replied with a slight grin, “My agent acquired it for me. He’d reckon that I needed to change up my image a little. I guess he didn’t sign up to be the agent of a one-dimensional action star or whatever.”

That got him a laugh from Harry.

Glancing up, Niall watched Harry’s eyes crinkle for a few blissful moments while he was laughing.

It made him, well, confused.

          “Dude-“Did Harry Styles just call him dude? “As far as I’m concerned, you have the part. Now lighten up and just talk to me!”

There was a pause before normal conversation actually began to start.

Once Niall had known of Harry’s approval of the casting, a weight was lifted off of his shoulders. He was finally able to talk with Harry, tell him about his inquiries on the story.

         “What inspired you to write it?”

Harry’s eyes lit up at the curiosity. Thoughtfully, he bit his lip before looking down at his lap, almost embarrassed.

          “Well, it’s actually been a story on my mind since high school. I was a bit more like James when I was younger. I was a bit crazy, actually thought I could be a musician.” He looked wistful for a second before continuing. “Anyway, I fared myself a bit of a rebel. I used to wonder what it’d be like, what it’d be like if these jocks that hated me were actually just like me. The thought twirled inside of my brain, and I didn’t actually start to write it until about a year and a half ago.”

Niall watched in awe as Harry talked about the screenplay with the same passion that Niall had felt when reading it.

         Afterwards, the food came. Niall watched as Harry repeatedly shoved food in his mouth while mumbling around it. “Aren’t you gonna eat?”

Nervously, he put a couple of the vegetables on his fork and smiled, with a bit of sass, at Harry.

        “Anyway, I talked to Dylan and he loved your audition as well. Everything should be good to go. We’ll just send you the contracts and filming should start sooner rather than later.”

Niall nodded as he listened to Harry describe the filming process.

Tan. Harry was tan. He looked like he had just been to the beach to go sunbathing or something. And his hair was really curly, not curly enough, however to be untamable. But his eyes, he kept going back to those eyes.

Harry must have noticed him looking because every time Niall found himself admiring them, the man would give him a smug, half grin, that he was famous for, in return.

Niall didn’t know what any of it meant, really.

After a quick fight over who would pay the bill (which Harry won, of course) they shook hands and parted ways.

         The whole ride home, Niall was in a daze. Harry was unimaginably charming and driven. He was unique, more special than any director or person that he’d met in the past. His enthusiasm practically bled through his writing. Niall had never been a writer, but he’s pretty sure that he could have written sonnets about the whole encounter.

Shaking his head, he left the restaurant, haunted by his intrigue with the man.

         “It’s nothing,” he whispered to himself as he held out his hand for a taxi. “It has to be nothing.”

 

         Harry watched Niall hurriedly leave the restaurant, he couldn’t help but feel pleased with himself. The kid, well, he wasn’t really a kid, but still, was adorable and had no recognition of it.

It would be interesting to see him transform into such a dark character, a character conceived by the pitiful depths of Harry’s own mind.

Niall may have played the action hero in his films, but watching him shudder and stutter made Harry realize that Niall was far from that stereotype in real life. He was tiny, tinier than he’d ever think that “Niall Horan” would be.

With Niall in it, Harry’s film would be perfect. He just knew

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try to upload twice a week. Hopefully. FIngers crossed.  
> Comment and all that jazz.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Production starts kicking off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suck I suck I'm so sorry this is a billion days late.  
> I'm sorry!  
> To all of the people that think this is going to get abandoned, I could never my lovelies! I'm just a bit...slow sometimes.  
> Take this chapter as my apology?

Soon enough, it was the read through.

Throughout the time before the read through, Niall read through the script constantly. It was amazing enough that he had got cast; it would be more amazing if they kept him. Niall really couldn’t understand how they had seen anything in him, but as long as they did, he would be the best damn actor they had ever seen.

He’d do well for Harry. He had to.

 

As much as he’d tried to cement the story in his head, he was still nervous when he walked to the production place.  Thankfully, on the way there, he walked by a familiar face.

“Look who the cat dragged in,” Dylan O’Brien, his new costar, chided him. With a smile, Niall looked up to see the puppy-like man. The thing was that Niall already knew what kind of guy Dylan was. He saw his cleverness, his go-to attitude, and his ability to make everyone happy. Dylan’s the kind of guy that you’d want as your best friend, someone on your side.

“Dude, I knew you’d get it. I’m so stoked now!”

Already feeling better, Niall laughs and opens the door for them. With a buzzing feeling in his stomach, Niall steps into the building, determined to do well.

He has to.

~

They both kick ass.

Harry can’t help obsessing on how… _well_ they both did.

He knew Dylan would nail it, of course. With all of the readings that he done with other possible candidates for James, Harry had gotten used to the idea of Dylan encompassing his character, Will.

But hearing Niall read, hearing his gorgeous accent bleed through to James, well, it was mental.

Harry just knew that Niall understood the complexity of James, the façade of smugness that cloaked the softness that lay deep in the boy. With one look, Niall had perfected the face of the misguided boy.

It was amazing.

Plus, the actor himself was beautiful. He was like a magical creature or something. Harry thought he could just look at him and watch him be for like hours and never get sick of it.

His fascination with the Irish boy-ergh man- was almost unsettling, but Harry didn’t really care. If someone else had the opportunity to watch Niall, they would. He was just that kind of person.

~

Overall, Niall thought that the read through didn’t actually go half bad. Everyone seemed so kind, and so willing to make the production good. The whole cast seemed to be enamored with the story, and with Harry Styles.

And honestly, Niall was right there with them. He loved watching Harry Styles’ eyes light up whenever something was said in the way he wanted or laugh when a funny quirk was delivered. It made Niall want to do that much better, to deliver his line with that much more clarity so he could watch Harry’s eyes light up. Because when that man did, it lit up the world.

But Niall couldn’t ponder what that actually meant, because next thing he knew, it was over. Everyone was congratulating each other, congregating together to share the buzzed feeling of the opportunity, and Niall couldn’t help but feel blessed as he looked at everyone in the room.

On the way back to his car, Dylan ran into him.

“Hey Horan-“his costar called out, “Would ya slow down?”

Turning around, he met eyes with a very disheveled looking O’Brien.

“I was wondering if you wanted to go to dinner.”

Before Niall could interject, Dylan continued.

“Not in a weird way or anything. I just… I’m so excited about this and you seem to understand your character and it’s wonderful and I just-“

Deciding to put the man out of his misery, Niall laughed and held out his hand to stop him.

“Say no more! We can go to my house.”

~

“Holy shit,” was the first words that Dylan uttered as he walked into the gigantic place that Niall Horan called “home.”

“Uhm-“ the bottle-blonde boy started, quickly putting his keys on the closest counter and headed to the kitchen. “It’s a bit big or whatever but my agent forced me to get the place, something about someone of my caliber not being allowed to live in a ‘shitty one room flat,’ or something.”

_Please don’t comment on how empty my kitchen is. Please don’t notice._

“This is my kitchen. I’m going to make us some sloppy joes and vegetables, is that alright?”

_Please don’t say anything._

In awe, Dylan looked around before promptly plopping onto one of the swiveling chairs by the island in the kitchen.

“Sloppy Joes, huh; that seems very American of you, Niall!”

With a laugh, Niall started to dissect his pantry, praying that Dylan wouldn’t notice the sheer emptiness of the place. He turned around only to see Dylan, like a child, twirling around in the chair.

Grinning, Niall scolded the “man.”

“You’re a child.”

Dylan stopped his incessant spinning to look up and smirk at his costar, before returning back to his twirling mission.

_He’s not going to notice._

Going back to his cooking, he couldn’t help but smile.

_Dylan wouldn’t notice._

~

About an hour into the “meeting,” Dylan had already decided that this would be, in fact, a sleepover.

“I just can’t leave you here! Not when we have SO much to talk about.”

Niall didn’t particularly care. His new friend seemed to be a breath of fresh air. The more time spent with him, the better.

They got down the basics pretty quickly,

It went like this:

**Dylan: So, are you gay? All girls for me, at least so far, but I want to know about you!**

Niall: What kind of question is that?

**Dylan: I just want to know the pool of people I get to set you up with, jeez!**

Niall: Oh. Well, I don’t particularly care. It’s not something that I’ve ever worried about.

**Dylan: So who was the last person you dated?**

Niall: I actually haven’t.

**Dylan: WHAT?!**

The conversation went on, accordingly.

“Does that mean you’ve never-?”

“Yup.” Niall answered, feeling the blush curl over his face.

Dylan looked quite remarkably speechless.

“And you’ve never… how does that work?”

He wasn’t actually offended by the questions. The guy didn’t actually seem to mean harm. He just seemed curious.

“I’ve always been busy. Never had time.”

The doe-eyed man looked at him incredulously, before promptly changing the subject to the movie.

“So this Harry Styles guy, seems like a fucking genius!”

This, Niall could talk about. He could talk about the genius of Harry Styles all day. The man was a mystery. How he had imprinted this incredible story to paper was a mystery to him. How does someone like Harry Styles even exist? Not fair.

With a small smile, Niall responded with, “Yeah, seems like it.”

~

The next day, Dylan and Niall rode to the production meeting together. They both agreed that it’d save gas, and it was just easier for the both of them.

The sleepover, in Niall’s humble opinion, was a success. They both continued to gossip about their characters, their experiences in Hollywood, and their (Dylan’s) old flames.

Niall felt a lot easier about the whole process after the night was over.

The second he got in the door, he was greeted by none other than Harry Styles.

“Gentlemen!” He exclaimed, before coming to a stop at the sight of their closeness. His green eyes raked over the both of them, a fact that did not get past Dylan, but Niall seemed unaware to.

With a sigh, Harry asked, “Did you guys both get here at the same time,” still trying to play nonchalance. Niall, who was unaware of the current predicament, exclaimed, “No. Acually, Dylan slept over.”

 

Harry’s eyes narrowed.

Licking his lips, he focused in on Niall and Dylan.

“You two seemed professional, so I THOUGHT I wouldn’t have to say this.”

Harry felt something building up in his chest.

“No relationships between cast. It’s unacceptable, a distraction, and frankly, unprofessional. I can’t believe you two. We’ve barely started. Jeez.”

He combed through his hair in frustration.

“Look, just don’t let it happen again.”

And with one swift motion, Harry Styles walked through the two flabbergasted men.

~

He just… he couldn’t believe them, couldn’t believe Niall.

Harry Styles, the famous, quirky director, was angrily pacing in the green room with these thoughts swirling in his head.

_How could they?_

_How could he?_

_Why?_

Niall had seemed so innocent to him, so small-like. Seeing him with Dylan had crashed that pure like vision he had had of the guy. It seemed wrong. Everything was wrong.

“Sir?” a voice interrupted his borderline obsessive thoughts. Attempting to gather himself, he spun around to see his first AD, assistant director, and friend, Liam Payne.

With a frustrated sigh, he looked at his friend.

“Hey Liam. What’s up?”

His friend seemed tentative.

“Uhm, I hope I’m not crossing any boundaries or anything-“

It seemed like Liam could go on for days.

With a small smile, Harry crossed to him and put a hand on his shoulder,

“What’s up, Payne?”

Liam, returning the small smile to his friend, looked up before saying, “I couldn’t help but hear what happened over there.”

With a start, Harry took off his hand on Liam’s shoulders and backed up.

“I just- it’s never been a problem with you and I just-“

Before Liam could go any further, Harry wagged his finger at him and quietly shushed him.

Startled, Liam stuttered out a couple of “uhms” before the director, in his infinite wisdom, said, “Liam, darling, my best friend and platonic love. Can we just-“Harry searched for his words for a second, before continuing. “Can we just not?”

Liam, suddenly remembering his “place,” looked down at his shoes before mumbling an _alright_ before leaving the room.

But, he couldn’t help but wonder _what_ was different about this time, or more importantly, _who_.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...am I forgiven yet?  
>  Let me know in the comments (:
> 
> ...still sorry.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niall finds out just how Harry inconveniently operates.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi hi hi  
> This is late.  
> I really struggled with this chapter.  
> Thank god for coauthors, I swear.  
> But it's here now and that's all that matters, right?  
> Right?

This wasn’t okay.

Harry wasn’t this guy. He didn’t get involved into the personal lives of his actors. Harry is the relaxed guy. Harry’s the calm guy. Harry is the director that everyone wants, the one that plays around with his vision and builds it with the people around him.

But something just _fuele_ d his anger inside of him, watching Niall with Dylan. The thing that struck Harry about Niall in the beginning was Niall’s blatant, uncanny innocence. He was fragile. That fragility was what Harry found so intriguing. How can a ray of sunshine be capable of being so glass-like? And when he saw Dylan with him, that illusion was shattered.

But, expectations are made to be shattered.

~

Suffice to say that the production meeting after their little encounter was awkward.

Thankfully, it didn’t heavily involve the actors. Usually, production meetings don’t involve actors, but that was again part of the process.  Even though the actors weren’t really involved, Harry couldn’t help but let his eyes flicker to Niall. They had a rehearsal after this, and Harry didn’t quite know what he was going to do, especially considering what he had planned.

~

“Alright guys. I think what Harry wants you to do here is face each other.”

Face each other? Niall hadn’t really experienced this before. With the type of movies he had been doing before. It was more like, “meet the pretty girl say hi, rescue her,” so on and so forth.

None of the flicks he had done had really depended on the romance. So, new experience. Niall could do this.

Behind him, he heard a soft rumble. Harry coughed before saying, “Yeah, Liam’s right. Please face each other.”

It was nice. Dylan was friendly and Niall didn’t mind looking into his eyes, even if it was a little weird.

“Now, uhm, Niall?” Harry asked, still pacing around the two men.

“When do your characters first kiss?”

Niall knows this answer.

“After his first game, Will’s I mean. They were arguing.”

He could see Dylan’s eyebrow raise. O’Brien seemed to not be into Harry’s unique techniques. Whatever. Niall saw Harry’s work. There had to be a method to the madness.

“How do you think James felt?”

Harry’s voice was ringing in his ear. He was only allowed to look into Dylan’s eyes, but he couldn’t help but focus on the warmth of the green eyes currently on him.

“Scared, I guess. Confused.”

Niall could hear Harry’s laugh from behind him. He was tempted to look back at the source, but he couldn’t. There was a small smile playing at Dylan’s lips, and Niall forced himself to focus on that.

He hadn’t really felt scared by another person before. Sure, there was the essential spin the bottle games when he was like 12, but even then, none of that had ever mattered. It all was out of necessity, to not be the weird kid. None of it had ever been like what James felt with Will. In that way, Niall was jealous of the character. Granted, his life did suck. But he got that big romance. Few people can really say that they got that, nowadays.

“What about you, Dylan? What do you think Will felt?”

With a contemplative smile, Dylan said, still staring into Niall’s eyes with a quiet nonchalance, “Freedom.”

~

Harry felt Liam nudge him. He had gone over the exercised he wanted to do with the two boys with Liam.

“I want them to kiss the first day.”

Liam gulped before looking at Harry incredulously. Liam could tell that there was no deterring Harry once he had decided on something. Still, it was a little strange to start off with that.

“You don’t think that will intimidate them?”

Harry smiled and patted Liam on the back.

“If that intimidates them, they were never right for their parts anyway, mate.”

And now, here they were. He had been talking about this first exercise for so long, but Harry couldn’t seem to tell them to do it. Liam had a feeling that it all had to do with the soft lad playing James.

He had never seen Harry like this. And Liam couldn’t risk him losing focus on this project. This was their baby. They had spent hours upon hours staying up late and talking about the story and what it meant to them. Liam and Harry grew up with each other. They both grew up out, and they both yearned to tell a story that reached out to youth, a story they would have benefitted from. Liam couldn’t let anyone ruin that.

So, he had to nudge Harry.

“Tell them. We’ve talked about this.”

Mumbling to himself, Harry, finally, grumbled, “It’s important for you guys to get comfortable with each other. So I want you guys to kiss. Right now.”

Both Niall and Dylan looked at him.

“Uhm… Harry, I mean is this really necessary?”

Poor, baby Niall couldn’t even look Harry in the eye. It was endearing. Liam couldn’t help but like the guy.

“Alright!” Dylan exclaimed, breaking the awkwardness. Dylan’s easiness was contagious.

 _I can do this_ Niall thought to himself.

It was weird, knowing Harry and Liam would be watching him have his first kiss with a guy.  He didn’t want them to know. It was so embarrassing. How could he tell them that he hadn’t kissed a guy without sounding like a freak?

“Dylan,” he whispered into the taller man’s ear, “I kind of have never done this before, mate.”

Shocked, Dylan pulled back, eyebrows furrowed.

“Niall.”

The man in question looked back, nervously.

“Niall, we don’t have to do this. I can tell Harry…”

In the small space, he couldn’t help but look at the director. He was watching them intensely, watching the exchange between the two guys.

Before Niall had a chance to reply, Harry sighed before shaking his head and saying, “If you guys can’t do this,”

That woke Niall up.

He needed to do this. Fuck if he was going to let anyone, including himself, ruin that. He grabbed Dylan by the shoulders, and pulled him into a gentle kiss, surprising all of the men in the room.

The kiss was sweet. Dylan’s lips were soft, and once he had figured out what was going, Dylan was able to take control.

It was nice. Niall ended up dropping his hands on Dylan’s shoulders to move them to his torso. He liked this feeling. He liked having someone strong and dependable there. Never had he liked the softness that always came with girls. They were always so delicate and it made Niall feel weird, like he was bound to fuck up and break them.

He had expected to feel like he was messing up. He had expected to question every move that he made. But he wasn’t. It was easy to just enjoy the experience, lose himself in another person.

 A soft cough interrupted the small moment.

When Niall pulled away, Dylan seemed amused, and a bit smug.

“Not bad, Irish.”

They both turned, in sync, to Harry, who was watching them with a gleam in his eyes.

With a calm stride, he walked towards the two boys, lightly putting his hands on Niall’s shoulders and moving him back a couple inches.

“You guys seem very…” he gulped before continuing, “comfortable with each other.”

A shrug sprouts from the brown-haired boy’s shoulders, while the bottle blonde continues to stand stoic as he received his critique.

“But the dynamic is wrong.” He turned to Dylan.

“Will is, Will is in charge of everything in his life. He’s the IT guy. He has the girlfriend, the job, the life, whatever.”

There’s a question in Harry’s expression that Dylan nods to as an answer.

“But not with James. With James, he relinquishes his control. He can’t control James. In fact, he doesn’t want to.”

Harry’s talked with his hands and lectured Dylan and it was so adorable that Niall though he could cry. But he wouldn’t.

“And you, Niall.”

Harry saying his name took him out of his trance for a second.

“Yes, Harry?” He thinks that maybe if he smiles, nobody will know that he thought about his director this way. What the fuck is wrong with him? They haven’t even started filming, and he has still managed to fuck it up.

Speaking of fucking up, his stomach was starting to bother him. How long had it been since he had last eaten? His stomach was clenching. It must have been awhile…how long was it…shit. He had to keep better track of this. He couldn’t very well pass out during filming. Christ.

“Earth to Niall. Niall.”

Oh. Someone was shaking him now.

Harry and Dylan were both on either side of him, wearing matching concerned looks.

Shitshitshitshitshit

“Sorry, lads. Zoned out there.”

Maybe if he tried to smile and laugh they’d move on. Maybe.

Dylan seemed to feel at ease by Niall’s halfhearted (and pathetic) attempt at an excuse, but the crease in Harry’s brow just wasn’t going away.

“James takes care of Will. He leads him when Will is lost. James is his light home.”

That made sense, at least to Niall.

“That means I’d take more of the lead right? At least with the uhm, first kiss.”

Harry was beaming back at him. Yes, Niall understood.

“Good Niall.”

The praise made his heart skip a beat.

“Now try again.”

~

“Zaynie!” Niall exclaimed, dropping his keys on his coffee table before dropping to his bed in a dramatic flair.

“Niall!” Zayn called back before coming into the room so he could drop right next to his best friend and sort of client.

“Zaaaynie. I can’t feel my mouth, honestly.” He pursed his lips at the darker boy, putting on his best pouty face.

“Well, they always said his methods were a little unconventional.”

 Grunting, Niall nodded his head in agreement.

“Yeah, unconventional. Apparently, unconventional to Harry styles means  having my tongue down Dylan O’Brien’s throat all day Jesus fucking Christ.”

Giggling, Zayn scooted closer so he could hold Niall, amused and smiling.

Niall was too busy freaking out to really pay mind to his friend.

Harry Styles. Harry fucking Styles. He was going to be the death of him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyhey guess what there's a kudos and comment button and they make my day. If you care about that kind of thing.


	5. Chapter Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liam meets Zayn, Louis meets Niall, and Niall meets his right hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiiiiiii  
> This is a little late but- ain't even worried about it.  
> Honestly, I had so much fun writing this chapter. It's probably my favorite so far. It's also the longest.
> 
> ALSO, that chapter summary...am I right?!?!
> 
> Oh, this chapter gets a little mature, but if you handsome devils are anything like me, I have a feeling ya'll won't really mind

This had to stop.

This obsession with Niall had to stop.

Liam didn’t know what Harry was doing. He had always been distracted, easily drifted, focusing his attention of pretty people and pretty things. But this was nuts. He was watching his best mate go into full-on distraction mode because of this boy.

Normally, Liam probably would have been amused. Hell, he’d probably be happy for Harry. But the lead in their movie, the one that they had put so much on the line for; It just wasn’t going to fly, not if Liam had anything to say about it.

But the worst thing about the whole situation, in general, was how annoyingly unaware Niall Horan was. Maybe if he had known that Harry was interested in him he could do something about it; Reject Harry and make sure he gets him out of his system. Anything. Liam just couldn’t let Harry’s little crush (borderline obsession, it was hard to tell with Harry nowadays,) interfere with the story they had been talking about for years. Any other time, it would be okay.

So, like the good assistant that he is, he went to the source of all of his troubles. In the least “stalkerish” way possible, Liam filed through the audition papers and found Niall’s address.

Bingo.

The source  
~  
“Zayn…”

The strong jawed lad couldn’t help but roll his eyes at his best friend. He was rolling around on the bed, animatedly looking at Zayn.

He couldn’t help but grin. He loved seeing Niall like this. This film had fueled his happiness. And Zayn honestly felt blessed to be able to watch this.  
He could kiss Harry Styles, but he had a feeling there might be some complications to that.

“Niall, honestly, I-”  
Before Zayn could finish his sentence, the doorbell rang. It was loud and obnoxious, but Niall refused to change it.

“It’s welcoming.”  
Stupid.  
“It’s stupid.”  
“Good thing it’s not YOUR doorbell then.”

Niall seemed to be sulking in his bed, grasping the sheets with annoyance and yelling nonsense. Sometimes, this guy was a child.

“Guess I’m getting the door,” Zayn grunted and mumbled to himself, trotting through the long hallway to get the door for the partially unwelcome visitor.

He didn’t bother looking through the peephole. This was a nice neighborhood, and not many people were allowed through the doors, so he assumed it was unimportant.

“Ya?” Zayn obnoxiously called while opening the door. Zayn’s slight A.D.D. made him unaware of social situations. Usually, it made no difference in his life. But he had some small quirks that revealed some of his problems. (Like yelling at doors)  
But Zayn, in no way, was prepared for what laid behind the door; a beautiful, beautiful man who looked like his eyes were made of sunshine, sunshine with scruff.

He couldn’t say anything. It was like he was star struck.  
The guy wasn’t doing much better, from what Zayn saw.

“I was looking for Niall Horan? I’m Liam Payne, the AD in his new movie for Harry Styles?”

He was adorable, too. Zayn couldn’t help but enjoy watching the AD struggle with his words. It was endearing. He seemed like the type of guy that could boyishly charm his way into getting his B+ changed to an A.

Reluctantly, Zayn let him off the hook.

“Do you always say statements as questions, mate, or are you unsure about yourself?”

Blushing, Liam reached behind his head to awkwardly scratch the small hairs in the back of his neck.

It was cute.

"Did you want to come in, maybe?"

With a shy nod, Liam walked past Zayn to awkwardly stand in the house.

"So...are you related to Niall or are you guys like-" 

He was struggling again, and it was still cute.

"No, man. I'm his best mate. I'm also his agent, Zayn."

Laughing, Liam reached out his hand and quietly muttered his name again.

"So did you want Niall? I can get him."

Liam was starting to doubt his plan. What was he even doing? Getting involved in his actor' lives; it was unacceptable.   
He just had to have faith that the situation would work out.

And maybe he'd pray a little that he could see Zayn again...  
~  
This had to stop.

Something about Harry was driving Niall crazy. It was making it impossible for Niall to do his job. The whole experience was weird.

After the infamous “kissing rehearsal,” filming finally started. It wasn’t like this huge production or anything. Usually for big-scale productions, pre-production could take forever. But not with this movie.  
Niall was learning to expect that from Harry now.

He was starting out with smaller, individual scenes. He got to film some scenes with his on-screen family (his mom was played by the quirky and always healthy Gwyneyth Paltrow) and his gritty, endearing best friend, Darren (played by the loveable and amazing Ansel Elgort.) His favorite scenes were with Ansel, so far. The growing star was like Dylan, a bundle of fun and joy. His character was super messed-up, always smoking in the corner and judging everyone around him.  
But Ansel was the furthest thing from his character. Niall always knew the moment he went from Darren to Ansel because his eyes brightened and a smile always bloomed on his face. It was great, and Niall felt so grateful to be surrounded by such talented actors.

His second favorite part about filming so far was meeting Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles’ resident makeup artist.

He met him the first day of filming.

Their first conversation went something like this  
“You must be Niall. I’m Louis. You’ll need me and you’re welcome.”  
“Thank you, then.”  
“I’m fabulous.”  
“I’m Irish.”  
“We’ll get on, Irish.”  
Then, Louis gave him an adorable, Earth-shattering smile, and the friendship was born.

The last thing that was the most memorable about filming (and arguably, the best thing) was, well, Harry. Niall would be awestruck by watching him work, watching him notice the little details in the production that would make the biggest difference. This guy was in his element, and Niall loved watching every second of it.

His stare was intense, and piercing. When he’d give someone a direction, he’d look directly into their soul and say what he wanted.

Once, when he was filming a scene with Ansel (it was James and Darren in James’ room, laying in bed, smoking, thinking about the year that was laying in front of them: Senior Year.)

“This is our last hurrah, Darren.”  
James turned to Darren, sticking his tongue out at him before taking a drag of his cigarette.  
Smirking, Darren took the cigarette from James while knocking his head back further into the pillow.  
“What are we going to do after high school?”  
Darren shook his head. James was always worrying, couldn’t just live in the moment and just be. Everyone always thought James was the partying type, but in reality, Darren had to drag him out. He’d much rather stay inside and read a book, then do anything else.

Harry had stopped them there.

“Niall, can you come here for a second?”  
Sheepishly, Niall made him way over to Harry. It was the third day of filming, and he had been trying really hard to not be him and fuck up. Obviously, he already failed.

God, he was a fucking mess.

His worry and dread must have appeared on his face, because Harry lightly grabbed both of Niall’s arms tucked into his sides and dipped his head so that Harry could look Niall into his eyes.

“Niall, hey, hey look at me.”

Still upset, he bit his lip in response and slowly dragged his eye line to Harry’s. Forest green orbs met him in response.

“Stop looking like that, doll. You’re doing great, I promise.”

His reassuring smile was slowly affecting Niall. Raising his eyebrows, Harry broadened his smile until Niall, reluctantly, giggled and mirrored him.

“I just wanted to tell you to relax a little, yes? They’re best friends, right? They’ve known each other for a long time. Have fun with the scene. There’s no right or wrong, okay?”

Looking down, Niall nodded again.

Get it together, Horan.

But, throughout the scene, it wasn’t Niall’s fear of being wrong that was making him tense. It was the specks of green boring into him, watching him, which made him overly aware of his movements.

His eyes, his smile, they were...doing things to Niall. Things that Niall had been unaware of for so long. It was making him hot and bothered knowing that Harry was watching him so intently. “Hot and bothered” wasn’t something that Niall did, or allowed himself to do.

When they took a break, Niall couldn’t help but let out of a sigh of relief. Louis met him at his usual seat to touch up his makeup. While he was applying it, Louis kept giving him strange looks.

Finally, Niall couldn’t hold in his curiosity.

“What are you thinking about, Louis?”

It looked like Louis was bursting to tell him.

“Niall, are you gay?”

The accused boy started sputtering, totally taken aback from the question.

“There’s nothing wrong with being gay, Niall, I mean have you met me?”

Louis, like the ever classy guy he is, decided to twirl there to emphasize his point.

“Niall, I saw the way you were looking at Styles.”

That made him pause.

Was it really that obvious?  
Was his fascination with Harry something more?  
And if Louis had noticed, does that mean Harry had, too?  
~

The rest of the day ended in a blur. Niall found himself partially sleepwalking through everything. He kept thinking about what Louis had said.

Gay  
Harry  
Gay Harry  
Harry Gay  
Holy shit am I gay?

By the time he had gotten home, he was fully in a daze. The only thing he could think about was Harry: his eyes, his arms, his smile, his tan skin, and the way his face always lit up when he got excited.

And he couldn’t help notice that the more he thought about Harry in depth, the more deeply frustrated and… oh god he was horny.

That’s what that was. Shit.

The only thing he could think to do when finally reached his bed was porn. His friends (and coworkers, if given enough alcohol) always raved about porn and masturbation. Niall had never really cared, only found it amusing if anything, but now it seemed like the answer to every problem.

Opening his laptop, Niall searched his brain for something to type.

“Gay sex” seemed too middle school, but “Gay Porn” seemed too suggestive.

Fuck Harry. This was ridiculous.

Not knowing what to type, Niall angrily shut his laptop before dropping fully onto his bed in exasperation. He buried his head in the pillow and laid his arms out to his sides.

Fuck Harry Styles and his stupid face and his stupid legs and his gorgeous smile and fuck the way he walked and talked and smiled like sun lit out of his fucking ass.

Goddammit, he was frustrated and horny and for the first time in his life, all he wanted to do was snog the shit out of someone and get off. He could feel the tension building up inside of the pit of his stomach. Wasting no time, (to be ashamed of himself, at least) Niall made the quick decision to snake his hand down the front of his pants to grab his already growing erection.

The only thing he could think about was Harry: how he’d feel on top of him, behind him, grasping his hips and pulling him towards him. Niall thought of how broad Harry’s shoulders would be, how his stomach would be hard and taunt, his thighs would be big and strong if he was on top of Niall, holding him down.  
Niall pumped his erection and hitched his hips, moaning into the pillow, telling himself not to mutter the thing he wanted.

His grip was firm and determined. He was desperately grasping onto some edge of reality, the edge of this beautiful personality.

He gave one, two, three more strokes before finally coming loudly, moaning Harry’s name as he finally released the tension that he had building in himself since the moment he had met Harry.

Giving out one final sigh, he pulled his hand from his pants and wiped the come off his hand with the sheets next to him, not wanting to get up and admit the reality of what he had just done.

Fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....soooo..?
> 
> Thank God for D or else that solo smut never would have been written because I almost died from blushing so badly.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first big scene is filmed.  
> Dylan is amused.  
> Niall’s oblivious, but what else is new?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyyyyyyyyyyy guys, buddies, hey. Sooo this is late. Gee what a surprise. At this point, I don’t even have any excuses. I just hope you all will take this chapter as my apology? Maybe?  
> Yesssss?  
> Also, I’ve never been in a movie (I’ve only done theater :P drama kid for lyfe yo) so please ignore all of the (inevitable) inaccuracies. I’m a writer. I made it up.

It didn’t take long for Niall to get into a different mindset. The wheels were turning in his head, and all he could think was Harry gay gay Harry Jesus Craic. God, he was practically an adult, and he was NOW having an identity/sexuality crisis? How was that fair?

There were few things that could actually take Niall’s mind off of Harry, but one of them was definitely this whole “Zayn and Liam” (Ziam? Niall could get behind that) fiasco. He kept pestering his best friend about the brown eyed, sweet as pie assistant director, but Zayn would always change the subject. But Niall was no idiot. He could see the blush twirl around that boy’s cheeks.   
He knew that there was something up, and he’d be damned if he didn’t explore it further. 

Fortunately for Niall, Zayn wasn’t hard to summon.  
It was the day of the first real big “shoot,” thus a reason to call his agent.

“Zayyyyyyn,” Niall pouted over the phone, giving Zayn his biggest this is important to me please come voice.  
“Niallllll,” Zayn whined back, reluctance etched in his voice, “you’ve done plenty of shoots without me. I promise you that you’ll be fine.”

Zayn had always been stubborn.  
But Niall’s resolve had always been stronger.

“I’m nervous, okay? You know how important this movie is to me and I don’t want to fuck it up. Frankly, I could use your support.”  
For a second, there was only silence. After a pause or two, there was a long sigh of reluctance and compliance.   
A grin bloomed on the blonde’s face. It was perfect.

Although most of what Niall had said was kind of shit just produced so that he could get Zayn’s lazy ass over to the set, there was some truth in it, too. He was nervous, extremely so. When he walked, he could feel a tremor in his right hand. The walk to wardrobe seemed disastrous. 

“Ms. Perrie Edwards?” the nervous boy called out, desperate for something to focus on besides   
the frog in his throat.

A beautiful, blonde and lilac-haired woman turned around, looked at him briefly, before giving him a small smile.

“Niall, isn’t it?” She asked, though Niall had a suspicious feeling that she already knew.  
The tremors still going through him, all he could do was nod. Scanning him gently, Perrie put her hands on his shoulders. She looked up at him, eyes soft.

“Hey, Niall. Can you breathe a bit for me, love?”

Panic arose in him. She could see it, couldn’t she? She could see how soft and weak he was. He had already messed it up fuckFUckfuckFuck-

A stronger and different voice cut through his inner monologue of freaking the fuck out, and a different set of hands were set to soothe him.  
“Hey buddy, Niall. Breathe.”

Niall opened his eyes, (he hadn’t even really realised that he had closed them) to see warmth coming from Liam Payne. Something about him was reassuring, more than Perrie was. Liam, well, Liam was Harry’s best friend, and somehow Niall acquired comfort from that.

“You alright there, Niall?” Liam asked, his eyes raking over all of the now settled lad, as if this was some bruise that Liam could check for severity.

Putting on his best, “No, I wasn’t suffering what the hell are you talking about.” smile, Niall nodded.

“I’m sorry guys, I”ve just been a little off today. Please ignore my small tantrum here.”

Liam didn’t really seem to believe him, so Niall attempted to smile brighter and put his hand on Liam’s shoulder.

“Seriously, mate. I’m fine. I’m sure you have more important things to do here than babysit me. Please don’t worry, alright?”

Again, Liam seemed to search for something on his face, before quietly nodding and moving away. Before he left, Niall called to him.

“Can you do me another favor, Liam?”

He turned around.

“Can you maybe not tell Harry about this?”  
~

The key to unhappiness, at least in Dylan’s humble feelings, was the denial of your feelings. When Dylan felt something, he went with it. It was partially what made him good at acting. He didn’t like to deny himself the pleasures (and displeasures) of being human.

When he first met his co-star, he could see that the boy reeked of self-denial; the way he held himself, withdrawn but still purposefully present. He could see the sadness in him.  
(Dylan is good at seeing people for who they really are)

But, when he saw Harry and Niall make eye contact during rehearsals, he knew something was there; he could just feel it.  
It was fun for Dylan in some ways, just because it was so ridiculous. Harry’s eyes would flare with anger every time Dylan touched Niall. (While Niall remained blissfully ignorant, bless him.)

It was ridiculous because all Dylan was doing was what Harry Styles   
himself told him to do.

Anyway, since he had learned about Harry’s irrational and misguided jealousy, he couldn’t help but poke at it, tempting Harry to do something. He liked Niall, and he knew that he deserved more than misguided jealousy. Maybe, maybe if Dylan poked and prodded at him longer enough, Harry Styles would grow a set and actually do something about his infatuation for Dylan’s co-star.  
At least, that’s what Dylan was hoping for. But for now, it was just fun to watch Harry squirm.  
~

Niall kept going over the scene in his head.   
James was at Will’s last football game. He was smoking to the side, but couldn’t help but keep his eyes peeled to the game. Will didn’t know that James was there, but James was hoping that he’d see him there anyway.  
Cue WIlliam winning the game  
Cue William running over there and kissing James in front of everyone

It was a cute scene, probably the happiest in the whole script. Niall, of course, didn’t want to screw it up.  
They had already filmed the big game. Now it was time to film Niall’s reactions and then the running and “big kiss.”

When Niall finally came on set, (after being subjected to Louis’ teasings about his “big gay revelation”) decked out in his full James gear, he couldn’t help but feel different. It was like the clothing had transformed him. It was easier to have that wide stride that James guarded himself with, and the half smirk became more natural to him. Perrie had done brilliantly.  
When he saw Harry pause and meet him with an enormous smile, he felt the panic from earlier wash away. He could do this. He is James. He knew this script, and he knew his character, dammit.

It was fun to see Dylan come onto set shortly after, dressed in his football gear. Somehow, the outfit seemed to make him seem so much younger.

Hollering and whistling, Niall made his way over to the faux football player.

“What a stud you are, Dylan.”

Laughing, Dylan threw his arm around the shorter boy before whispering in his ear, “You’re not so bad yourself, toots,” before smacking his ass and walking away.

Shaking his head, Niall made his way towards the football stadium. Dylan was an idiot.

From the corner of his eye, Niall could see Zayn make his way onto set which was perfect. He and Liam were bound to run into each other.

Niall was a proper cupid, and a proper stud.  
~  
Turns out that kissing Dylan from numerous angles, repeatedly, wasn’t half bad. The exercise that Harry had had them do was really helpful. All of the early bird jitters were out of the way. He felt comfortable with Dylan, at least, comfortable enough.

Also, it helped to be under Harry’s instructions. It was nice, even. Harry was always watching, always silently analyzing. Normally, that’d make Niall feel nervous, anxious even.  
But with Harry? It was different. He almost felt like a guide, rather than a judge.  
Niall couldn’t help but feel so grateful.  
~  
At the end of the long and stressful day, Niall was almost gleeful to be able to get back to wardrobe and hand Perrie back the wonderful clothes she managed to craft. When she saw him come back, she smiled back at him before grabbing his clothing and putting his classic leather jacket on the “unfinished rack.”

That was weird. Niall thought it was great. It was his favorite part of James’ wardrobe.

“Miss Edwards?” asked Niall, tentatively

She rolled her eyes at him before smiling and saying,“Niall, please. Call me Perrie.” 

Chiding himself, he continued.

“I was just wondering why the Leather Jacket is unfinished. I thought it looked nice today.”

He peeked down at Perrie, praying silently that he hadn’t offended her.

“Oh, darling. I just… it was a little tight on your torso. I guess I must have gotten the measurements wrong-”

Without even realising it, Niall started to tune her out. 

tight on your torso  
tight on your   
tight on you  
tight  
What she said kept repeating in his mind. Niall felt like crying. It wasn’t fair. He was trying so hard… he had even been cutting back for the film. He was trying so hard to look good, and he had just managed to screw it up.

It wasn’t fair.

Managing to compose himself, he gave a silent nod to Perrie when she finished talking and headed out.

He would just have to try harder. Eat practically nothing. Eat only when necessary.

Then, he’d be good enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo… am I forgiven? Hey, if you’re still mad, feel free to leave a comment down below telling me why! (See what I did there?)


End file.
